Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers - A Painful Psychological Legacy

There are daughters of narcissistic mothers who have barely survived psychologically. In the extreme, there are daughters who starved themselves to death by anorexia as the only way they could find to salvage some small crumb of their existence. We know these daughters, even though their secrets of maternal deprivation and abuse are well camouflaged behind shining faces, glowing grades and strong professional portfolios. Trapped from early childhood, they are victims of a mother who was incapable of loving them.

The narcissistic mother is psychologically fused with her daughter. Her coldness and lack of empathy affect her child from the beginning. These mothers experience their daughters, not as unique individuals, but as extensions of themselves.

Narcissistic mothers sabotage their daughters efforts to become separate productive individuals. The narcissistic mother is envious of her daughter on every level. This becomes particularly pointed as her child moves into adolescence. Young men are beginning to take notice and indicate that they are sexually attracted to this young woman. This puts the narcissistic mother's back up. She feels a gnawing envy in her gut to compete with her daughter. The mother undermines her child, telling her a series of lies that shake her daughter's confidence in her feminine identity.

Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers - A Painful Psychological Legacy

The hypnotic hold a narcissistic mother has on her daughter can be so strong and pathological that the child doesn't know what she is thinking or feeling. The narcissistic mother takes full credit for her daughter's achievements at the same time that she constantly criticizes and demeans her child for using initiative or having creative ideas. The daughter who dares to think for herself or who moves toward psychological individuation is heavily criticized, labeled as a rebel and striped of any meaningful role in the family.

The narcissistic mother frequently causes powerful and damaging psychological rifts between her children. Narcissistic mothers pit one sibling against the other and use conspiratorial secrets (often lies) to further poison and destroy the relationships between her children.

She will choose one child as the special one. Often this is a child who is particularly attractive physically, highly intelligent, or displays artistic or musical talent. This child is worshipped by the mother. The chosen child can do no wrong, even if he or she is cruel, mean and deceitful to others. The chosen child is the perfect incarnation of the mother. The narcissistic mother chooses another child as the loser. This daughter becomes the target and reservoir for the narcissistic mother's expression of her unconscious feelings of self hatred and worthlessness. This child is a living disposal for the narcissistic mother's toxic venom.

Narcissistic mothers are never satisfied. If the daughter receives B's in her classes, they could have been A's. "Just apply yourself, dear. What's the matter with you?" Narcissistic mothers are obsessed with image. If the target daughter is slightly overweight, the mother makes snide remarks about her child's body. You're looking a little thick around the middle; your upper arms are on the chubby side. Your friend Sandra is nice and thin. If you watched what you ate, you could be attractive like she is." Narcissistic mothers are relentlessly cruel and critical. They would discover flaws in the perfect daughter. This will always be true since the narcissistic mother suffers from a severe personality disorder. These individuals are completely self absorbed, cold, manipulative, deceitful, exploitive, and lacking in the slightest portion of human empathy.

Most daughters of narcissistic mothers survive this malignant abuse. They learn to block their strong emotions and dance to their mothers' tune to save themselves. Some daughters become highly rebellious, act out with drugs, alcohol or sex and leave the family prematurely.

Daughters of narcissistic mothers can heal through the work of psychotherapy. One of the first issues is acknowledging and grieving over the fact that they never had a real mother, someone who loved them and cared about them as a separate, valuable human being. Daughters learn that they are not  their mothers. As horribly as they were treated, some daughters spend their lives forming dysfunctional relationships with men who resemble their narcissistic mothers. They repeat the psychological patterns of childhood rather than work through the pain to transform it.

On the other side of the cauldron of transformation, daughters of narcissistic mothers are born for a second time. They are in touch with the loveliness of their bodies, the exquisite beauty of their minds and psyches and the vast depth of their souls. Now, they feel authentic---fully alive.

Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers - A Painful Psychological Legacy
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Linda Martinez-Lewi holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is a licensed marriage family therapist. She has extensive clinical training in narcissistic and borderline disorders. Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi is the author of the book "Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life."

Dr. Martinez-Lewi has worked for many years with patients experiencing psychological problems as a result of personal and professional relationships with narcissistic personality disorders. She has clinical experience treating patients suffering from childhood trauma, anxiety disorders, and depression.

Dr. Martinez-Lewi has been interviewed on numerous radio talk shows throughout the country.

Visit her website at: http://www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com

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Dante's Inferno - A Summary of the Circles of Hell

Dante's Divine Comedy is a journey through the afterlife of Inferno, Purgatory, and Paradise.

The Journey begins with Dante lost in a dark wood. His only escape is down through Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven, guided by the poet Virgil.

This epic poem tracks that amazing journey through the afterlife. Dante first enters the afterlife through the gate of Hell.

Dante's Inferno - A Summary of the Circles of Hell

The Gate of Hell - Cowards who refused to take a stand for or against God

Forever running and getting stung by wasps.

Circle one - Limbo

Virtuous pagans, Virgil, Plato. Unfulfilled desire and hopelessness.

Circle two - The lustful

Francesa and Paolo. Cleopatra. Eternally being swirled in wind.

Circle three - The gluttons

Guarded by the three-headed dog, Cerberus. Eating slime and muck.

Circle four - The prodigal and the miserly

Hoarders and wasters pushing an enormous stone against each other.

Circle five - The wrathful and the sullen

Thrashing and bodies torn apart in dark filthy water.

Circle six - The heretics

Living in smoking tombs.

Circle seven - The violent, the suicides, the blasphemers, the sodomites, the usurers

A river of boiling blood guarded by Centaurs. Souls become a forest of suffering trees, others torn apart by dogs, rain of fire, mutilation.

Circle eight - Fraudulent, pimps, seducers, flatterers, simonists, sorcerers, corrupt politicians, sewers of division, falsifiers, alchemists, thieves

Eternally walking and tormented. Living in excrement. Stuffed into holes. Heads turned backwards. Boiling tar. Lead capes. Snakes. Flames.

Circle nine - Sinners against family, betrayers, traitors against country

Encased in ice. Home of Satan. Cannibalism. Judas being eternally chewed by Lucifer.

Dante's Inferno - A Summary of the Circles of Hell
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Dave Lafferty is the creator of the website http://www.davelafferty.com This site follows Dante in his journey in the afterlife, and is written for the average person without a background in classical literature.

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Zumba Dance Classes - Top Mistakes to Avoid Before You Take a Zumba Class

Have you been looking at Zumba lately?

Are you looking to take some Zumba dance classes but have been a little leery, intimidated or just shy about it? Well forget all that because a Zumba class is just plain - FUN! Here are the Top 3 tips to know in choosing Zumba Dance Classes

Tip #1:

Zumba Dance Classes - Top Mistakes to Avoid Before You Take a Zumba Class

Location, location, location - Check it out first. Find out what kind of facility, what type of flooring. The better the flooring the easier it is on your feet. You will be less prone to injuries - such as shin splints. You can generally tell if a floor has a concrete base, you will feel it in your calves after a good cardio. The best possible floor to workout on is a floating floor. One that has a layer of "cushioning" between the base and the wood.

Tip #2

Research the instructor - Make sure the instructor teaching is a Certified Zumba Instructor. Inquire about the type of fitness background he or she has. Do they have other certifications? Preferably you want a Zumba instructor that has been certified as a personal trainer. Why? He or she can then help you with any sticking points you might have in shedding those hard to shed fat stores.

Though it is not required by Zumba, a Certified Zumba Instructor with a strong fitness background is better qualified to teach you. They have a knowledge base of - anatomy, physiology, nutrition and they know how a body works, what are the best foods to eat that will aid you in shedding body fat. They can guide & assist you in discovering what types of foods are the best to help boost your metabolism and what the top stretches to perform are. A crucial part of good exercise science is to always stretch before and after your Zumba dance classes.

Tip #3

Does you Zumba Instructor have a dance background? Either trained in the classics or trained in the ballroom. This can help immeasurably in getting the maximum benefits from your Zumba dance classes. Don't shrug this tip off!

All of these things together, help make your Zumba dance classes the "party" that they are going to be.

Zumba Dance Classes - Top Mistakes to Avoid Before You Take a Zumba Class
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In Summary:

Zumba dance classes are a fat burning, body shaping and fun workout program and the best part is any one any age can get results fast!

To learn more about losing body fat, weight, quickly reshaping your body and having fun while doing it... Click to http://ZumbaFitnessNJ.com for class schedules in New Jersey and free Zumba tips, tricks, DVD and video.

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Decorating Your Prom Or Homecoming Dance With Lights

The homecoming dance in the fall and the prom dance in the spring are the two most anticipated and memorable events for high school students. The decorating committees for these dances are required to provide a stunning and beautifully decorated space for their peer group. That sounds like a tough assignment, but by using several sets of mini lights, Razzberry lights, Strawberry lights, C6, C7, and C9 lights, and battery operated mini lights creatively throughout the space, you'll find that you'll have a beautiful space in no time.

The prom evening really begins when the students step out of their limousines and begin the long walk into the party area, so bring them into the space in style. Create a tunnel of lights using several mini LED light sets intertwined with airy gossamer streamers over a sturdy base of PVC pipe or other durable tunnel construction. The lights could be the ever-popular white mini lights or light sets in colors that match your school colors.

The dance floor is the focal point of a dance, so use mini LED light sets and gossamer streamers to create a stunning ceiling above the floor. The mini Christmas lights provide a warm and romantic glow when the lights are turned down low.

Decorating Your Prom Or Homecoming Dance With Lights

Columns whether free standing or part of the party space, will look gorgeous wrapped with tulle or gossamer fabric and then wrapped with Christmas lights from top to bottom. Or, for a more subtle effect, wrap the column with the lights first, and layer the fabric over top of the lights.

Dozens of strands of mini lights - clear and multi look great - draped on the ceiling will make your gym or party room really sparkle. Strings of traditional C7 and C9 lighting with 12 inch spacing also works equally well for this - and is a little less work.

Each table centerpiece should be lit to lend a soft glow to the seating areas. Instead of using open flame candles, try battery operated mini lights nestled inside or surrounding the centerpiece. They'll provide light and beauty at each table.

The DJ booth is the perfect backdrop for using Christmas light sets. Create a wall of light behind the DJ using school colors or a light color that compliments the dance theme. Surround the DJ table or booth with lights so students can spot him easily when they want to request a song. Rope light is also good for accenting stages and DJ booths, as well.

Photographers for homecoming and prom dances usually bring their own props and lighting. However, why not create a photo opportunity wall for the students in another spot so they can take impromptu photos with friends with their own personal cameras? White mini lights are ideal for decorating an empty wall and for draping around props to add sparkle to the photos.

Every high school prom features a King and Queen and their court at the end of the evening. Create a platform with thrones for each person on the court. Our battery operated mini lights are ideal for using in a space where an outlet isn't readily available. Wrap each chair with white mini lights first. Then, cover each chair completely with gossamer fabric, creating a large bow at the back of the chair. Complete the majestic look with curly ribbons and large pieces of confetti.

Christmas light sets are a must in every dance committee's toolbox when it comes to decorating an empty space for a special dance event such as homecoming or prom. We have every style and color of light you need to make your dance an unforgettable event for the students at your school.

Decorating Your Prom Or Homecoming Dance With Lights
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Shellie Gardner is the owner of Christmas Light source, a great place to find Christmas Lights. Christmas Light Source is a one stop shopping source for Christmas lighting needs. From hardware to lights and everything in between, they has everything for holiday lighting decor as well as tips, tricks and do it yourself projects.

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"I Carry Your Heart With Me," A Discussion of the Poem by E. E. Cummings

The poem, "i carry your heart with me," by E. E. Cummings has been a favorite love poem and a favorite selection at weddings for many years. The poem has gained renewed interest since being featured in the film, "In Her Shoes." It is used with devastating effect in the film's climactic wedding scene and again to close the movie. Countless fans have been inspired to review the touching words of "i carry your heart with me."

The Poet

E. E. Cummings was born Edward Estlin Cummings in 1894 in Cambridge, Massachusetts. He died in North Conway, N.H., in 1962. Cummings earned a B.A. degree from Harvard in 1915 and delivered the Commencement Address that year, titled "The New Art." A year later he earned an M.A. degree for English and Classical Studies, also from Harvard.

"I Carry Your Heart With Me," A Discussion of the Poem by E. E. Cummings

Cummings joined an ambulance corps with the American Red Cross in France during World War I. The French imprisoned him on suspicion of disloyalty, a false accusation that put Cummings in prison for three months. He wrote the novel, The Enormous Room, about his experience. Many of Cummings' writings have an anti-war message.

Cummings was a fine artist, playwright and novelist. He studied art in Paris following World War I and he adopted a cubist style in his artwork. He considered himself as much a painter as a poet, spending much of the day painting and much of the night writing. Cummings particularly admired the artwork of Pablo Picasso. Cummings' understanding of presentation can be seen in his use of typography to "paint a picture" with words in some of his poems.

During his lifetime Cummings wrote over 900 poems, two novels, four plays, and had at least a half dozen showings of his artwork.

Contrary to popular opinion Cummings never legalized his name as, "e.e. cummings." His name properly should be capitalized.

The Poem

E. E. Cummings' poetry style is unique and highly visual. His typographical independence was an experiment in punctuation, spelling and rule-breaking. His style forces a certain rhythm into the poem when read aloud. His language is simple and his poems become fun and playful.

Cummings' poem, "i carry your heart with me," is about deep, profound love, the kind that can keep the stars apart and that can transcend the soul or the mind. The poem is easily read, easily spoken, and easily understood by people of all ages.
The poem could almost be called a sonnet. It has nearly the right number of lines in nearly the right combination. But, typical of a Cummings poem, it goes its own direction and does so with great effect.

The poem makes an excellent love song when set to music. The outstanding guitarist, Michael Hedges, has set "i carry your heart" to music on his "Taproot" album. Hedges himself sings the lead, but the backing vocals are sung by David Crosby and Graham Nash.

More than 168 of Cummings' original poems have been set to music.

Enjoy the words and the sentiments of this famous poem.

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in

my heart) i am never without it (anywhere

i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done

by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear

no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want

no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

"I Carry Your Heart With Me," A Discussion of the Poem by E. E. Cummings
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********************
Garry Gamber is a public school teacher and entrepreneur. He writes articles about politics, real estate, health and nutrition, and internet dating services. He is the owner of http://www.Anchorage-Homes.com and http://www.TheDatingAdvisor.com

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What is a Lap Dance? - A Man's Ultimate Fantasy

What is a lap dance? It's considered a form of exotic dance. Some historians believe exotic dance goes back as far as Cro-Magnon times. Ancient Babylon, India, the orient and the Middle East all practiced goddess worship as part of their culture.

In Western society Goddess worship was prevalent. Dance was significant in worship and an example is dancing around the maypole. It has been said that the Maypole may have been the origin of pole dancing. Belly dancing is also considered a form of exotic dancing. Many of these had been used as a form of entertainment and a way to please the gods.

In the 1900's the art of strip tease was integrated by dancers in burlesque shows. Pole dancing appeared in the 1960's and in the 1980's, the first 'modern' pole dancing clubs was born in Canada.

What is a Lap Dance? - A Man's Ultimate Fantasy

It was during the 1990's that exotic dance, pole dancing and lap dancing grew worldwide appearing in London and other major cities. Lap dancing has become widely accepted with clubs entering mainstream entertainment. Although it appears to have been an underground form of dance for many years, this has now changed with people across all sectors enjoying an evening in a lap dancing club.

What is a Lap dance? It's a playful and sensual erotic dance in which one partner rubs against the other partner in a sexually suggestive way. It can be carried out in a light, fun teasing kind of manner that will usually involve basic touching and teasing. Or, it can also be carried out as a more serious and seductive act that will involve intense physical bumping and grinding.

The lucky individual receiving the lap dance is seated on a chair, knees spread opened and in most cases will have his hands tied. The dancer will sexually sway, slinking between his legs and rubbing against his body while slowly stripping. Contrary to what you may think, women love to receive this dance as well as men. So, if you want to surprise your girl friend and get her desire burning for a taste of you - don't think twice, get down and shake your hot body.

The amount of contact is not the only thing that varies. Apparel may be colorful as well. The dancer may be totally nude, topless, wear sexy lingerie or be fully clothed. The seated partner will always remain fully clothed

Full-contact lap dancing usually involves sensual bumping and grinding. It's not uncommon for the receiving end to be brought to orgasm throughout the dance. When performed in clubs, contact between dancer and customer is regulated. Intensity varies according to local laws and club rules, ranging from "air dances" with minimal or no contact to "full-contact" which involves genital contact through clothes.

Remember, this teasing should not be mutual. Your partner should not be allowed to touch you as freely as you touch him.

What is a Lap Dance? - A Man's Ultimate Fantasy
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If you're looking to turn your man on, re-ignite the passion in your relationship and be the only woman he fantasizes about -- surprise him by learning how to do a Lap Dance

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Planning a Halloween Party That Elementary School Kids Will Love

Every family celebrates Halloween differently. Some parents are too busy to prepare a grand party and simply carve out a pumpkin face, put a candle inside and position the scary pumpkin in a window facing the street. However, if your child is attending a school Halloween party and you're going to participate, you have to think of more Halloween ideas to contribute. Here are some suggestions:

"Scary Face" Painting

If you have a week or so before the party, you can learn the basics of face painting and use your skills to make Halloween more fun and memorable to the kids attending your Halloween party.

Planning a Halloween Party That Elementary School Kids Will Love

If you're not the artistic type, you can hire two face painting artists for the day and put up a stall in the venue for face painting. Some kids will be lacking in the costume department, and face art will make up for what they lack. Divide the kids into two and line them up to have their face painted. Let the kids choose the designs by giving out flyers with a list of the images they can ask the artist to paint.

Create Your Painted Pumpkin Family

You can use paper mache pumpkins or real ones for pumpkin painting. The objective is to give younger kids something to do with Halloween pumpkins without exposing them to sharp edges, knives and the other dangers associated with jack-o-lantern carving.

If you're ordering pumpkins, ask the supplier to pick out large, medium and small sized pumpkins to represent each member of the child's family.

For school events, however, the kids can have one pumpkin to paint and bring home after the party. Prepare supplies like glues, acrylic paints, permanent markers, colored paper, old newspapers, eye-drawing cut outs, ribbons, colorful stickers and party hats. Let the kids paint funny faces on their pumpkins and decorate them using the supplies you provided.

Freeze Dancing

One of the best activities that a group of elementary kids can participate in at a Halloween party is Freeze Dancing. Choose a lively Halloween CD and let the kids dance for a while before stopping the music. Each child has to "freeze" when the music stops. You can designate two or three teachers or parents to supervise the game and eliminate kids who move even a little while the music is not playing. The last child standing is declared the winner.

Snacks

You can turn any snack (cookies, rice pudding and ice cream) into a creepy, crawly Halloween treat just by using green or orange food coloring and serving with candy corns.

Planning a Halloween Party That Elementary School Kids Will Love
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There are a variety of other activities you can do at a Halloween party like dance dance revolution or halloween carnival games.

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